Monday, January 4, 2010

I should tell you

that I've gained four pounds in 2 weeks. 

I should tell you that this morning, I reread an email I had from Valkyrie where we discussed the New Year and eating better and trying out the Atkins, and then in a carbohydrate panic, rushed over and made 4 more mini pancakes for myself from Jonathan's stash.

I should tell you that last night, as I watched Desperate Housewives, I couldn't believe that Really Fat Susan looked like a skinny version of me.

I should tell you that I weigh almost the same now as I do when I was 40 weeks and 1 day pregnant with my 8lb5oz baby boy.

I should tell you that I can't figure out what has happened, or when I eat, or why I eat, or what I eat that is causing this to be so.  I know it isn't hormonal, because in the hopes that my thyroid all of a sudden gave out, I went to the doctor and got a complete work-up, only to be told I was the healthiest fat person he'd ever seen.

I should tell you that today, I promised myself I would go walking with the boys despite it being virtually impossible because of their yelling and squirming to "walk" along with me, which turns my power walk into carrying a 30lb baby home with me while the neighbors slow down and stare.  And instead, I ate a hamburger from McDonald's.  *barf*

I would tell you all these things, but the problem is, I haven't told myself yet.  I've been getting by on my "pretty face" for a while now, but my newly founded double chin is getting in the way.

As soon as I decide to face the truth, I promise, I'll tell you. 


Valkyrie said...

Yeah, actually that's what did it for me too. The double chin. I could look good in pictures from the boobs up for a long time. Not anymore! I hate looking at pictures of myself. I can't take it anymore.

I started Atkins yesterday. Two days in. So far so good. It's just really hard for me to go without my wine. Boo hoo!

I've cut calories as a natural consequence to eating more fat and protein which is more satisfying and filling.

I think this regimen would be hard for a person with a sweet tooth. WW might be better for people who HAVE to have carbs and sugar.

Jodi said...

Something is wrong with me. Don't hate me for this but I am losing weight WITHOUT trying. Like I eat what I want, when I want and I rarely leave the couch. No joke, no lie, no exaggeration. I think it is just extreme stress and I rarely have an appetite.

I haven't weighed myself but my clothes are looser and I can tell in pics of me. It almost has me paranoid that something is like seriously wrong with me.

Anyway, maybe I shouldn't look a gift horse int he mouth or some shit, right?

And for the record, I would kill to look like you. <3

Little Miss Me said...

Oh my God, Jode!!! Why would I hate you?!?! I think that's fabulous! I'm really happy for you! I think you should enjoy it and consider it a life changer and try to figure out what's going on so you can continue to replicate it in the future!

I think my problem has been that my metabolism is at a complete stand still. And the only time I have recently lost weight was 1) when I was nursing Bry and Jon (in the first year) and 2) when I was doing bootcamp that I was eating like a man. Actually, I didn't lose weight with bootcamp, but I could tell that my metabolism was working better. Being hungry every 3 hrs is actually a good thing if you're eating the right kinds of foods, etc.

Valk, I could never do WW. I don't have a sweet tooth, but I do feel like I can't go on without my bread. It's been a struggle. And it's not even like I eat so much of it, but it's just not the same as it was 5 years ago. waaaaaaah!